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And a hello to you all. I am now, for today, going to interview Dykeisii, and for short- Kei. He's with me here, and I am going to ask him incredibly boring questions. You WILL read them.

PRESS: What is your full name?

DYKEISII: Dykeisii Kimoko.

PRESS: How old are you?

DYKEISII: I'm seventeen.

PRESS: I see. Where do you work? Assuming you do.

DYKEISII: (laughs) Yes, I work, I.. sing for a living.. I don't like it much though. Too many restrictions. (smiles nervously)

PRESS: What is your family like?

DYKEISII: Well, my parents are still alive; my mom doesn't like me much. I have three sisters, Kinasuuke, Shaana, and Yasako'o. But Yasako'o changed her name to Jessica. My parents are Junpei and Akihiko. Shaana is my twin sister. We're pretty close.

PRESS: Big family, huh?

DYKEISII: Well.. Kinasuuke left when I was fourteen and we.. haven't heard from her since. Yasako'o- I mean Jessica, heh. . . I'm just not used to her new name. Anyway, she refuses to have anything to do with our family. That's mostly my fault. Only Shaana and I are still in contact with our parents.

PRESS: Sounds complicated.

DYKEISII: Yeah.. It's a real pain.

PRESS: So, what are your hobbies and interests?

DYKEISII: Well, I obviously like to sing. But I cook, too. I'm not very interesting. (smiles nervously again)

PRESS: Are you not telling us everything?

DYKEISII: Of course I am! I'm just not very interesting.

PRESS: (wary look) I see. Well, what sort of music and movies do you like?

DYKEISII: I.. well, I. . . uh. . . why does that really matter? You'll laugh at me, I know it.

PRESS: No, I won't.

DYKEISII: Um. . . okay. . . Have you heard of Pantera?

PRESS: Yes, I have. Do you like them?

DYKEISII: They happen to be one of my favorite bands. Now, if I like Pantera, what kind of music would I like?

PRESS: Stuff I don't. That, of course, would be HARD ROCK. (that's a hint)

DYKEISII: That would be right.

PRESS: What kind of movies do you like?

DYKEISII: I uh.. have about the same opinions on movies as I do music.

PRESS: Huh?

DYKEISII: Well, what do you usually think of when you think of hard rock?

PRESS: Dead people and other violent things.

DYKEISII: Well, put THAT into a movie format.

PRESS: Horror movies?

DYKEISII: (nods happily)

PRESS: Do you get grossed-out easily?

DYKEISII: ..Sometimes.

PRESS: Where were you born and raised?

DYKEISII: I was born in a plane over the Atlantic Ocean. We moved a lot when I was little. I've lived all over America and Europe. My parents really liked to visit weird places and cause a commotion.

PRESS: Oh, I see. So, did you ever have any pets?

DYKEISII: My sister Shaana liked to think that Kinasuuke's Barbies were dogs and that she could walk them. And rip off their heads.. and arms, legs and anything else that could be ripped off.

PRESS: Okay. Now on to more. . . physical questions. How tall are you?

DYKEISII: I'm really short. I'm only 5'5.

PRESS: All right. What is your favorite food?

DYKEISII: Uh, well. . . I really don't KNOW. I like a lot of different foods, I guess.

PRESS: Oh, okay. Is your hair naturally. . . green?

DYKEISII: Uh. as far as I know. I don't dye it.

PRESS: Are you close with anyone who lives here?

DYKEISII: Well, uh. . . besides Shaana, no, not really. Yorhana's only interested in women, of who he meets a LOT of. He's only interested in one thing, and I think we all know what that is. Setsuna. . . well. . . he rarely comes out of the basement. Dorian just isn't ever here. Anyone else who lives here never even speaks to me unless they are paying thier room bills.

PRESS: Okay, then. Well, do you like to crossdress? You seem to.

DYKEISII: . . .

PRESS: Well?

DYKEISII: I don't want to answer that.

PRESS: Picky, are we?

DYKEISII: I said I don't want to answer that. I have my reasons, which I don't need to tell you!

PRESS: Okay, okay! Bite my head off, why don't you?

DYKEISII: I did not.

PRESS: Fine, we will move forward. What is your opinion on marriage? What do you plan to do with your life?

DYKEISII: I don't have any opinions I want to share with you. I don't know what I'm going to do.

PRESS: You're still all anal about the crossdressing thing, aren't you?

DYKEISII: Look, I said I don't want to answer your dumb question! Who would want to marry a loser like me? Nobody!

PRESS: Geez, okay! Man, you are crabby!

DYKEISII: (glares)

PRESS: Look, I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make you all mad and stuff.

DYKEISII: Oh, that's fine. (smiles)

PRESS: Moody. You are very moody. Well, anyway. So, how much do you weigh? Being 5'5 and so thin, it can't be much.

DYKEISII: I have no idea why you'd care. . . but. . . about 120 or so. I think, anyway. But, Mr. Abi says my thighs are getting fat. . . so I have to lose weight. I hate diets.

PRESS: Uh. . . oh, I see. So, what's your favorite color?

DYKEISII: Colour?

PRESS: Yes, color.

DYKEISII: Um. . . light blue.

PRESS: Well, one last question- Are you single?

DYKEISII: ....

PRESS: Well? Do you have a girlfriend?

DYKEISII: That's a complicated situation...

PRESS: Well, explain.

DYKEISII: Because of how I work, people think that I am a woman. Besides that, the company that owns me thought they'd boost populatrity by getting me a "stage boyfriend". The poor guy knows, but there's nothing he can do. Because of that, technically, no, I'm not single. But since it's a "stage boyfriend", then, yes, I am.

PRESS: Are you gay?

DYKEISII: I AM NOT GAY!! I'm just in touch with my feminine side, that's all!

PRESS: Did you know only gay people say that?

DYKEISII: I AM NOT GAY!!

PRESS: Okay! Okay! Just thought I'd ask. Then, are you interested in having a girlfriend?

DYKEISII: That's none of your business.

PRESS: You're blushing.

DYKEISII: I am not!

PRESS: Well, that's all the questions for today. By the way, Dykeisii, I can see why you're called "The Dotei!" Well, bye then.

DYKEISII: Who told you that? And why do YOU care? I bet it was Yorhana, wasn't it? How very kind of him. . . *glare*

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